So, one thing for me is that it's awkward in the structure, dynamics and the mixing.
Most epic tracks build up to the percussion toward the end or the "chorus", but you start with percussion, build a bit, and then it unexpectedly all drops out and changes to a new section. Rather jarring. The percussion doesn't come back, either.
The other issue, which also erodes the "epic" and "hype" that these tracks usually aim for, is that the dynamics throughout the piece are fairly consistent.
The last thing is that there isn't enough depth in the mix. For example, your tambourine (?) hits (which are very machine-gunny) sound much to close to the listener IMO, as does the piano. I'd send the tambourine into the farthest reverb send and the piano back aways too, to more-realistically emulate their positioning on the stage.