Ryan Fogleman

I like this quite a bit! It has a very nostalgic and organic quality to it. The only thing I was left wanting was perhaps some more dynamic variation, or rubato at key moments, although I realize this is mainly the fault of MIDI and something that would come about naturally if performed by a real choir. I sang along with the bass part and had no trouble sight-reading, so the difficulty should be manageable for any choir you give this to. I think the subject of the piece, and the text (which you wrote, I presume?) are very accurately represented by the music. The concept behind the work, the non-universality of the language we use to describe the world around us, is a very interesting thing to think about. Great work overall!

You pulled some gorgeous sonorities out of this ensemble! I love the wide, open harmonies you use, especially in the change around 1:05 in the video. The meters and melodic structure also make me think of something like a wide, open field and the smell of fresh air. I'm actually reminded of some of the work that Motoi Sakuraba did for the video game "Eternal Sonata" (one of my favorite game scores)! Great job.

Nice work! I like the use of counterpoint, although I feel that some sections could benefit from some more adventurous movement or modulations. I agree with Monarcheon that using phrases in different key centers could help accentuate the role of the form. I also think that some dynamic variation could help breathe more life into the overall sound. Great job overall, it suits its purpose well and I see nothing that would make it unsuitable for an amateur choir. Best of luck in arranging a performance!

Hi everyone! I'd like to share a choral piece I'm working on (I think it's mostly in the final stages of composition, perhaps a few notes here and there will be edited, but I think have the form/structure as I would like it.) I set one of my favorite e e cummings poems to music and just felt my way through the text and the emotions I felt while reading. I'd love to hear any critiques from people more experienced with the idiom (I'm studying composition at university, but only started 2 years ago so I am still learning things everyday!) I intend to speak with the choir directors at my university to see if they would be interested in running the piece, and if they have any advice on writing effective choral music. One of the things I am particularly worried about with this piece is the clarity of notation. There are a few parts of this piece where I was unsure of what accidentals to use (such as in the "i fear" section at bar 32) or if I spelled a chord incorrectly, as I predominantly write by ear. If anyone could shine some light on potential problems in this regard, that would be extremely helpful. Thank you in advance for any feedback! i carry your heart with me (i carry it in 12-29-17.mp3 i carry your heart with me (i carry it in 12-29-17.pdf

Hi everyone! I wrote this piece, "Penumbra", at the request of a teacher, and I liked how it came out. The inspiration musically was based around progressive rock and jazz fusion structures and harmony. I have only a little experience with clarinet and cello, so I'm not sure whether all of the fingerings are ideal. I'd be very grateful if any players of those instruments could give me feedback on that. Penumbra.pdf Penumbra.mp3

Thank you both for the feedback! Gustav- I'm honored by the comparison to Whitacre, and I understand what you mean as far as awkward movement in the voices and chromaticism. I haven't formally studied the types of harmonies that I used throughout the piece, and my judgement of my own work isn't too reliable, so of course the ear of another musician is very helpful in figuring out what does and doesn't work. If I do record the piece with my own voice (although I'm not so sure of my soprano chops haha) I'll post a link as an addendum in this topic. pateceramics- Yes, the sound sample is the MIDI choir soundfont built into Windows. I admit it doesn't sound very good, but in the future I'll be looking into more professional programs and sample libraries to better represent the sounds I hear in my head. Your insight about the technicalities of choir are very helpful :) I didn't consider the relative balance of parts in a typical section when writing this, so knowing what to expect if I tried to arrange a performance is definitely good to know. Again, thank you both; I'll try and apply some of the ideas you all wrote about in my next effort for choir and post it here. Best Wishes, Ryan Fogleman

Hi, everyone! After hearing some of the beautiful compositions other members of this forum have posted here, I decided to share my first choral piece, a setting of 3 Sara Teasdale poems. I'd love to get some feedback on it and answer any questions people might have.