I think the idea is interesting overall! The instrumentation is cool and I like some of the rhythmic ideas!
My main concern would be the musical "goal" of the idea. For me it seems to loop without any development. As a type of background music to say a video game, I think this type of piece would be a perfect for it! But if it were meant for a more "performance" type of music, then, I would look into how to develop ideas further!
As it is, it does not sound bad! I would like to ask, who are your influences and what type of music are you looking to write! Keep going!
Also, my ear did not bleed lol