Hi everyone, I found this place yesterday, and I realized it might be more beneficial to many of my current worries in life than anything else! Big statement, I know... but you'll see why. Or maybe not, this whole subject is very hazy to me. Excuse my repetitiveness!
I've played piano for 6 years and clarinet for 7 years. I'm an average piano player, but posture, arm movement, and physical barriers have been holding me back technically (I can't play scales fast, or anything near virtuosic). Some day it maybe it will click. But it hasn't yet. On clarinet, practice seems much more proportional to improvement. I can say that I'm prouder of my clarinet skills, and advancing decently seems like a greater reality than for piano.
Since I'm going into my senior year (school starts tomorrow...), it's about to be college applications crunch time. That said, I have no idea where I want to go or what I want to study. I'm exaggerating: I would like to study composition, but I have no hint of any other possible majors.
My life these days, more during the school year, pretty much revolves around music, and the past few years I would assume show a clear dedication to music. So to me, it seems foolish if I were to go into something besides music, because I've put so much time and effort into it. But then I think of the big conflict: is a degree and intense study in music going to support me later on? Will I be able to get a decent career?
Composition is an area that I'm really interested in because I would love to write music, and I think it would be enjoyable/rewarding. I'm deterred from music performance in college because, well, there are some really good pianists, and I'm not really interested in playing clarinet professionally. But then more conflicts hit me: I have never composed, besides two short pieces. I have some confidence that I can compose, because I can sit down at the piano and improvise around a tiny bit. I could expand on something like that... but I'm getting sidetracked.
For the past week I've been thinking about music schools. Say I make it into a good school (not likely, right now), and I graduate having learned an amazing amount. My fear is that I wouldn't be able to get a steady job. So my dilemma is this: I would like to go into music as a profession, but I have this image of music careers that is of the starving musician, barely making money to get by (and I don't just mean performers). I don't think I have a broad enough scope of possible careers in music out there.
I feel like I should evaluate whether making a living off composing music is probable, alongside beginning to compose more, instead of finding schools currently.
I think I got aross most of what I had in mind, but there's a lot that I've forgotten. Nothing is quite clear in my mind... maybe some of you will know what I mean. If anyone could enlighten me, correct me, reassure me, tell me the truth, or just anything about music school, or careers, or life, I would very much appreciate it.