Lesson with JairCrawford

Listen to what I said about rhythm. Your first bar has three crotchets. At the start, the melody is clearly following a 6/8 rhythm, so it would be best not to totally upset that at the outset.

Do you know how 6/8 works, as a time signature? I'm not patronising - perhaps you haven't learnt that yet.

You harmonised the 9th bar OK - but you treated the Db as if it was a C# (so as if we have an A major chord) - this doesn't work well going into the 10th bar. This progression is bad (from 9 - 10).

The only other thing I have to say is: watch for false relations. A false relation is where you have a note in one part which is followed by that note flattened or sharpened in another part. (Or some difference of accidental - the first could be sharp, the second natural). In the last bar, you precede the F# in the melody immediately with an F natural. False relations' use depends on the style you're writing in. They can be quite acceptable, if they're a consistent part of your style. In this case, just be sure you want it there. At least make sure you can hear it.

(keep going - not bad so far!)

Ah. Ok. I updated it again.

Either the updates aren't working, or you're not listening to me.

Which post did you update?

Top of page 3

Well it looks almost (if not) exactly the same as before...

I changed measures 1 and 9. Oh wow! Ok. Hmm.... somehow, it didn't change. Ok, It should work now.

Looks the same. Bar 1 should not be 3 crotchets - we're in 6/8, this is what I've been saying.

Really? I tested it, it looks different to me. I'm sure I changed the 3 quarters into two dotted quarters in measure 1.

Well if you did that, then good.

Keep working - I'll probably be able to see it when you post a totally new file, when your next update is.

Post a new file - it's not updating for me.

Ok.

2ex-2.sib

I'm still getting 3 crotchets in the bass of the first bar.

How about now?

Bar 11-12 parallel fifth.

Yes, you've definitely got something to work with here.

Now, I want you to refine this, working on the sense of direction! The harmony has to go somewhere. Make that Db the climax of the phrase (or not - remember that you have 2 different versions to do), but certainly the music has to go somewhere.

Think about the direction of your harmony, and which chords bring about that sense. Think in chords, as I said before. Imply the harmony with only 2 voices, but think in 3 or 4 or as many as the harmony needs.

Also, be careful not to run all over the 6/8 in the wrong places. You're still doing this - I don't know if you understand how 6/8 works, although my melody certainly is odd within 6/8.

I decided to keep the three quarters in the second bar for variety.

Ok, I filled in the harmony.

2ex-3.sib

A couple of rather nice bits, actually.

When something new comes in, you must prepare it. You must prepare changes into what seems 3/4 time. You must prepare that leap way up to the Db.

You seem to be thinking too locally with the harmony. Perhaps each beat works, but each chord doesn't flow into the next one the way it should. Play the progressions at a piano - make sure you're writing a satisfactory progression. Albeit it's hard to do so with this melody, but I think it can be done.

Just go over your harmony again with a fine tooth-comb, and fix anything that even sounds 'not quite as good as it could be' to your own ears. I don't want any 'this will have to do' in here.

Btw, you are still causing the music to trip up on occasion by mixing metres/rhythms. Just be careful.

(good work though - I just want you to polish it before you do any work with it)

The last two measures are proving to be the most difficult. It comes to an end so suddenly. About the 3:4 stuff, sometimes I put three quarter notes in just to vary the bass and harmony some. Is that ok, or should I change that?

You can use three quarter notes when it feels right, yes - just make sure it works with the strange rhythm of the melody.

Your ending actually seems OK to me. I'll have more suggestions when you've done a bit of tweaking.

Ok. It has been updated.

I can't get your file to work in Sibelius, so I'm just squinting with Scorch and trying to read what's there.

Bar 2 - your crotchets in the bass and the ties at the end of the bar go a little too far in obscuring the sense of 6/8.

Bar 4 - both violin and viola resolve to the Eb, creating some unnecessary dissonances, and sounding clumsy (because they both go to the Eb).

Bars 4 and 5 - your chord (from bottom up) Bb C Eb is a 7th chord in 3rd inversion, making the bass note a dissonance. Dissonant notes usually resolve downards by step, especially in these chords. Your Bb really should move to an Ab (or at least pass through one).

In a 20th c. tonal context (which the melody can be seen to imply), you needn't necessarily worry as much about this, but your preceding bar is pretty traditional - and you need to be consistent about the ways in which you resolve dissonances. For now, just be aware that this chord is a dissonance. Perhaps experiment with 7th chords and their inversions. (we can go over this in here if you'd like)

There are a couple of nice less traditional bits here in the bass-line, but you tend to confuse these with your alto. This is why I wanted just a bass-line - if you focus on getting a strong bass, filling in the middle part will be easier. As it is, you're using the middle part to cover up the places where the bass is weak.

Bar 7 - last beat - I don't understand this fourth. A fourth is a dissonance, and must be resolved. The upper part does not fall to a resolution, so don't put in a D in the bass part. If you were wanting to use quartal harmony, then using a C in the viola might have helped, or something similar (A in the bass). However, you haven't used any so far, so bringing it in now would be inconsistent.

Bar 8 - your going from melody with quavers accompaniment in 6/8 to (what is practically) a homophonic 3/4 bar is very ungainly. You should probably keep some faster motion in there. It is always a good idea to prepare changes like this, so that they don't appear random. Whether these changes be changes of metre, note values, homophony/heterophony, or anything else, preparation is necessary.

Watch for parallels throughout.

I think I'd like you to remove the inner part, so that we can properly work on the bass-line. I did tell you not to write an inner part until the bass was complete, and, as I thought, the viola is distracting you from creating an effective bass.

Creating an effective bass-line is one of the most important things in all types of music, and it really is lesson worth learning (not that I am fully equipped to teach it, but I certainly am constantly heeding my own advice - trying to better myself at creating good bass-lines). It is also a lesson with bearing throughout all composition you're doing in the real world (not just in practise and assignments and lessons). If you can bring it into your real music, then that's one large step on the path of improvement.

I want you to remove the alto, and re-post the exercise with amendments.

Things I'm looking for:

- contrary motion between bass and soprano;

- harmony implied by these two outer voices;

- consistency (of rhythm, harmony, use of dissonances. This also includes preparing 'new' occurences, as mentioned above.)

Again, some of the melody will make it almost impossible to use traditional progressions, so if you capitulate to this, you must use non-traditional progressions throughout.

None of these things necessarily is an absolute (e.g., contrary motion is a 'usual' thing, not an 'always' thing), but certainly bear them in mind.

Would you mind posting the next exercise as a PDF, as well as whatever else? I'm having trouble with your files, and I'd like at least to be able to see the notes clearly.

Happy Birthday!

...

Now get working!! :P

Thanks. :P

Well, I think what happened is, I gave you a bass line only, and you approved it. But, when I started to add the viola, I changed the bass some to fit the viola part more.

I will probably not be able to do anything this week. I am leaving on vacation tomorrow and will be gone for 3 days. Then, I have to work on a term paper. :angry:.... so.... it will probably be next week before I can work on this. But when I do post it I will make sure to include a pdf. Would you like for me to also include a midi?

Sure, pdf and whatever else.

I haven't forgotten, but I've had school stuff lately. I'll work on it as soon as I'm not as busy.