Composition Lessons with Michael P

Michael,

I was able to get a good sense of where you are at by the peices you showed me. From now on, post updates on these pieces on here so that we can discuss any critiques I might have about the composition. Let's start by reworking the piece called "Atonal Piece #2."

Firstly, I would like to look at the piece sort of theoritically.

1. How long do you want the piece to be?

2. How long does the piece NEED to be?

These are two important things you need to consider while developing the piece.

3. What is the form I'll be using? Do I want it throughcomposed? If not, how many times should the "A" theme material come back?

4. How can I develop phrases when antonality has, is some sense, no "direction"?

These two are also important. Take the first 7 measures of your piece "Atonal #2." Is there really any direction to this opening phrase? How could one make it work better?

Consider your first phrase: This is your original

How can we give this melody direction. It doesn't seem to want to go anywhere? Well, let's think of some basic elements of phrasing. We need to give the phrase some shape. The melody you have written here has no shape. It just meanders in a few different ranges of the piano. That won't work. Remember, music, especially melodic music, has shape; if melodic feel or countor needs to keep rising, then let it rise and then, when it reaches a point at which you feel it needs to fall, then feel free to bring it back down. (I'll show you a revised example in a few minutes).

Secondly, What about rhythm? Taking a look at your example, I can see one thing immediately that creates a problem, that is, that you don't have a rhythmic scheme. You seem to blindly be putting different rhythms that you kind of find cool. What you need to do is create a motive and stick with it for at least a measure or two. Near the end of the phrase, the rhythm can and, at least in this example, should become more complicated as you are about to arrive at the cadence. In your example (measures 5- 7), you actually slow down and become less complicated before didling with something there at the end. IN the end, the phrase sounds like it has gone nowhere.

So here is a revised version that I have written as an example:

Notice what i've done. I kept your initial statement, and I repeated (granted I shifted it a beat or so and messed around witht he last notes length a bit). Then, in the second half or the half in which we are bringing the phrase to a close, I became a bit more complicated with the rhythm, starting in the bass clef and then moving to the treble. Notice the shape of the phrase. It still starts in the bass clef, but notice how it rises and ebbs according to how the counter or shape of the notes coming before it rather than just meandering. This is giving it direction. I end the phrase with a four measure rest before restarting the first material. Here is a midi:LISTEN!

For homework:

Develop two possible first phrases that employ direction via both rhythm and shape/contour. Each should be 6 to 10 measures long and based on your first two phrase motive.

Ok it took me several tries but I think I have given what you've asked for. It was I a lot harder than I thought it would be. The first try didn't feel was very good so that's why I did 3 versions.

Try 1

Try 2

Try 3

As for the questions you had asked. One of my biggest set backs as a composer is that I don't have any skills in developing what I've written, I know the theory behind development I just have a hard time putting it to practice. I would like this piece to be long enough for me to get the feel for working with a.)atonality and b.)developing and idea. When I first wrote this piece I was just playing around with atonality. Should I feel that I can create something from this I will let you know.

Micheal

Michael,

Good try. I think number 2 worked the best. I felt it had the best direction and phrasing. However, All three of the themes lacked one extremely imporntant concept: unity. There is no unity in the phrase at all. This happens because you have no repition, in any form, of the first subject. Thus what happens, is that the phrase sounds rushed and feels as if it has no connection to the material before. Look at my example before. At the start of measure 4, I recall the material that came before it. Sure I brought it up an octave, transposed it, and offset it by half a measure, but the listener is able to identify that it came from something before it. To get what i'm talking about, let's look at a basic phrase from Beethoven. Take Sonata in F minor: Just listen to the first phrase. He takes an idea, repeats the idea, and then develops the idea by shortening the first motive, becoming more harmoniously adventurous, and becoming more rhythmically interesting. Don't worry about the rest of the piece now. Let's just get this concept of the phrase down. We'll develop more dramatically later.

Another good example is

piano sonata by Mozart. Again, just listen to the first phrase. Notice that he repeats the first motive before, (you can hear that same note being hit many times, twice in the first phrase), moving on and developing the phrase. We call this phrase structure a sentence. Of course there are many types of phrases including, say, the popular parallel period, and others.

Here is an example of an atonal piece. In this piece, Webern, is using rhythm to hold his phrases together. Notice the three note motives between each instruments. Of course, he won't do this all the time or else it will become predictable and being predictable is, in essence, bad because it bores the listener.

I digress however. The point is about phrases. So For:

homework 2

I want you to revise your beginning phrase once more taking into consideration how these three composers shaped their phrases. Write two phrases. The first one including your first motive, and the second one including a phrase that is completing different from the first, but that includes some common elements of the first phrase. Per say, rhtyhm, register, etc.

Here is my fourth try at revising my original motive. I will get the other part of the homework up as soon as possible.

Thanks

Michael

Ok here's the other theme. I hope it is what you were looking for.

Hey, It's pretty good. I think again, you are trying to do to much with earlier material. I feel like you can be more consistent with the material you have before you develop it. The idea hear is to write something that feels like a theme here first so that you can develop it later. Just because the piece is atonal doesn't mean it has to get crazy, and if you want it to get crazy, I'd rather you see it get crazy because of development. After all, it's in the development section that you will really be trying to build the piece up to a strong climax for the piece.

In any case, I would like to see you write a new theme that is completely different from the theme that you have written. You can do anything you'd like with it, new rhythms, whatever. The idea behind this will be to write a good transition that can get your from THEME A to THEME B. So write a new 12 measure phrase that is completely different from the first one. Okay, not completely different, rather, something that is contrasting.

Ok, here's my first shot. lets see if I can get this right in under 3 trys. :toothygrin:

Hey Michael, The google doc isn't working can you reload it possibly today or tomorrow and I'll get to it right away. I am pretty much finished of all the work I had to do for my Master's Degree so I'll have much more time to work with you on your music.

ok. just for good measure here is the Finale version and here is a PDF.

Good job Michael! This is much much better and clearer than the previous versions. Now, I need to ask, is this your first section or your second section? If it is your first section, then great. The material is much more relevant and consistent with the rest of the piece. Now, in a similar style, I want you to write a completely different second section. It can be more thematic or much more disjunct (like jumping around registers and stuff a bit more). Make it about 8 - 12 measures long. One you are finished with that, we'll take a look and it then possibly move on to creating a transition between the first and second sections.

I thought this was the second section? Would on of the other themes I wrote work if I were to just re-vamp them?

Yes, Try revamping hte other themes. That would be a great idea. Post it once your done and on top of that, try creating a bridge from THEME A to THEME B. It would be wise to try to create momentum that leads the piece to THEME B. A transition is usually created by momentum and momentum is created in several different ways. First, build the rhythm, more complex or in a sense (quicker rhythm) can create a sense of movement, especially if the theme is going upward. Second, dynamics. As seen in many different piece when trying add momentum composers will add dynamics more instruments, and even more notes. Consider that when building. Third, where is the piece going? Sure, it's atonal, in that case, where do you need the melody to the transition to lead to in order for people to know that you are in the new theme and no longer transitioning?

Try asking yourself these questions when composing the transition.