First Piano Concerto (Second Movement)

Hi guys,

This is my first time posting on this site, it looks to be a great place for composers. I'd like to share with you the second movement of my first piano concerto, I'm eager to hear what you think.

Unfortunately it's recorded through Sibelius so it doesn't sound all that authentic.

Thanks,

P. M. Joyce

Hi there, and welcome! Hope you find what you're looking for here.

Specific notes:
m. 16 - voice leading of the left hand sounds awkward... the 7th normally resolves to the tonic 3. You did it in measures prior as well.
m. 19 - just making sure you know that clarinets are Bb instruments and horns are F instruments, so will not read those concert pitch notes the same way. Sometimes it's implied, but normally it should be written. 
m. 51/113 - Especially with winds, you generally want it so players have an ending note to play in the next measure, and not just cut them off. 
m. 58 - Dynamics should be marked on the measure with notes.

General notes:
For a piano concerto, the piano is pretty underutilized. I know you have it so it plays melodies some of the time, but then so do your other instruments. It's always okay to have piano as accompaniment some of the time, but there should always be focus on it, even in a slow movement.
String writing: some of your slurs are a little strange. And when you don't put slurs, the blowing comes out awkward. Generally, 16th note phrases (of 4) want to start on down bows, and eighth notes at the second speed of the piece can be played with 2 up bows in a row in necessary. Long slurs are generally not appreciated. Some composers wrongly use slurs are phrase markings. Don't be fooled. String players are wired to look at slurs as bowings.
Wind writing: I kind of like how it's pecky at some points. With the exception of E, I can't see any major breathing problems, so good on your for that. Circular breathing is not for everyone. Like I said above, winds generally want to have some sort of ending note in a run or thematic passage, just so they have a bit more closure. You should probably add some slurs to various parts where there are triplets or sixteenths, since winds don't want to always have to tongue if necessary, especially with faster stuff.

This was pretty nice sounding at the very least. Definitely tonally classically in sound. Nice-

Cheers!

Agree with everything Monarcheon said...especially the fact that not much of the piano is used for a "piano concerto". Even when you have the melodies being passed around in the winds/strings, the piano MUST play something underneath all that....be it counterpoint, embellishments, etc. (a good example is the Schumann piano concerto). 

You have charming little melodies, but aren't well developed to sustain interest. A good exercise would be to take the melody from the beginning of this movement, and break it down, and then alter it harmonically, rhythmically, orchestration-wise, etc. Also...TOO much C major...

This is really cute. That word can sound so condescending but it's the best way I can think to describe the melodies here. The previous comments by Danish and Monarch (most of which I wouldn't have thought about myself ) are pretty insightful. I definitely think you should feel proud of what you have so far, and I also think you should push it farther. Of all the things to do when trying to improve your music, I've found that altering melodies is the most fun.

Thanks for the replies. Monarcheon, thanks for the detailed response and insightful comments. I'm not too familiar with winds (in terms of how they're played) at all so I'm glad to hear there aren't any major breathing problems. Can I ask why winds need a note to finish off on? Apart from the notes you picked out, such as string slurring, was there any problems with the score?

On 23/9/2016 at 2:58 AM, danishali903 said:

Even when you have the melodies being passed around in the winds/strings, the piano MUST play something underneath all that...

Thanks for the reply danishali903. I definitely agree the piano isn't as prominent as most piano concertos. However I did a little research while writing the piece to find out if, for example, a concerto needed a cadenza to be labelled a concerto. I couldn't find anything that set out rules for a concerto, other than the fact that it was originally seen as a battle between the solo instrument and the orchestra. I want to ask then, why you say the piano 'MUST' play more? I'm really not a fan of the word 'must' when it comes to music, suggesting there are rules that can't be broken. Would you say that because most composers use the solo instrument more, I should use it more? Or is it more a fact that it doesn't strike you that the piano is a solo instrument? Do you think it would be more suitable to change it to a symphony or something else? Thanks.

Thanks very much for the positive reply, KJ. I haven't normally messed with melodies too much after I've written them, I'll give it a go, cheers.

11 minutes ago, P. M. Joyce said:

Can I ask why winds need a note to finish off on?

Imagine you're playing a really complex rhythm on drums or something. Wouldn't it feel much more satisfying and complete if you ended on beat one? This isn't so much the case if winds slur (although it is nice), but with tounging it really helps.

Your engraving is generally okay. When you have a sixteenth, rest, sixteenth, rest figure, perhaps beaming them would help, but it generally looks okay.

That makes sense, it's about the performers then, not the instruments? In that case, should all instruments have closure, and was it just a case that you picked up on it for the winds? Ah, I'll fix the sixteenth, rest figure.

Thanks very much.

P.S I'm currently putting together a portfolio for conservatoires for entry to undergraduate composition courses. Do you think this would be a suitable submission?

1 minute ago, P. M. Joyce said:

In that case, should all instruments have closure, and was it just a case that you picked up on it for the winds?

Unless the piece is notably aleatoric, I would suggest some sort of closure for most instruments, as a general rule. Definitely not always. It doesn't even have to be that audible. 

When I applied to conservatories for comp before I switched to Music Education, they were very picky about classical theory and orchestration, and then ideas. That's all I can say, considering I don't know if you really like this piece or if it's an example of your best work.