The Incantation of Hervor (Draft)

This is the first of three vocal chamber pieces I'm working on. They're all based on and adapted from ancient Norse poems (translated into English).

The Incantation of Hervor relates the story of a valiant young 'shield-maiden' (Hervor), who visits the burial mound of her father (Angantyr) to demand that he (now a ghost/wraith) give her his magic sword, which she considers her inheritance.

I've never written a piece with vocals before. It was certainly a challenge to get the lyrics to match up with the music, and I had to make some minor alterations to and omissions from the original text (but the spirit of it is still there). I realize there are no slurs and not many expressive markings -- this is just a first draft.

Any feedback, comments or criticism is welcome! Thanks for listening.

Overall I liked this a lot, especially the melody and the mood. And the bold gestures. I wonder if it needs more than just piano accompaniment. For example, when the bass voices enter and you had the piano play fast notes. That was great, but that was when I wanted a different color for that. Something to think about, Nice work. I think you could have left off the tag at the very end, it wasn't really needed.

Thanks, @Ken320, I'm glad you enjoyed it! I totally understand the desire for more tone-colors. I originally wanted to make these full orchestrations, and I still may, but I wanted to see if I could make it work with just the piano. I tend to want to make everything a full orchestration, which hasn't really gotten me anywhere. Maybe a good compromise would be to add some wind instruments to this version.

Yeah, listening back again, the ending seems a bit cliche. I have to work on writing better endings. I tend to just slap down the first thing that comes to mind in order to wrap up the piece quickly. 

Thanks for listening and reviewing! 

Sorry, I haven't been getting email notifications ... I think you have a perfectly good ending, right up until the final, final tag, which is a sort of anti climax. Easy to fix, right?

Btw, what happened to the Chat thingy here at YC?

19 hours ago, Ken320 said:

Btw, what happened to the Chat thingy here at YC?

 

It looks like it's back, but with all the history erased. I was worried it would be gone for good. It's where most of the magic happens on this site