Fantasia

Hello Everybody,

I just wrote a new piece for piano. It refers to my memories of a boat trip on the sea. I would be interested to hear what you think of it. (See the revised version in the post above)

Best regards

Very heavily influenced by Beethoven's Tempest, or just a gigantic coincidence? Not saying it's wrong, just curious. :)

(One of my very first compositions was extremely similar to the Rach C# minor Prelude, even though I had never heard of Rachmaninoff and never heard that Prelude at the time!)

Hello SonatainfSharp

You are right! There are really a lot of similarities with Beethoven´s Tempest. When I started writing, I did not think at all about this piece (although I know it). I just wanted to get a feeling of waves on the sea, being in a small boat, and include some dramatic events. But when I was sort of half way, I suddenly realized the similarity to the third moment of the Tempest. But by then, it was a bit too late to change everything. I actually considered discarding the lot but somehow, I was in the mood to continue with it. I made some attempts to go in a different direction, but, apart from the change at bar 71, I only succeeded to change the rhythmic and melodic line after the arpeggio´s in bar 131-138 .

Well, it is what it is, you can´t win them all.  Maybe I should just delete it and forget about it.

Again, thanks a lot for your comments!

20 minutes ago, panta rei said:

Nope, never delete anything. (Don't know why my reply is in a quote box!!)

Thanks a lot ilv for your comments. I am glad that you like it. As you may have noted, I became a bit hesitant about it, but other people seem to like it as well.

Best regards.

I like the piece too. The Tempest inspiration is obvious, but the piece has enough originality so that it becomes an homage, not plagiarism 😌

The only bars in the whole piece I didn’t like were mss. 33-40. To me, it sounded unintentionally comical, even clown-like. If I were you, I’d axe it.

Lovely, lovely piece, enjoyed your various developments. Even mss. 71 on sounded like an elaboration of the climactic end of the 3rd movement Tempest. Very cool.

Technical suggestions: please trim 5-note chords where the pianist is expected to keep the melody. The chord at ms. 84 — it’s not exactly impossible, I suppose, but it’s unnecessarily uncomfortable. Removing that bottom E in the R.H after 3rd or 4th beat, or at least making clear the left hand thumb can take over (which would fix it), would be much easier on a pianist. Also, mss. like 193 and 196 are awkward: I’d suggest removing the Eb in the accompaniment so the melodic part can have its clear Eb’s without juggling with the L.H. and on 196, remove the Eb in the left hand on beat 3 or 4, and voila, much easier, no music sacrificed.

I really enjoyed listening to this, thanks for sharing 😌

Hello Serge,

Thank you very much for your comments!  I had more or less put this piece in the archive drawer, but your inputs prompted me to look at it again.  I am particularly grateful that you have taken the time to revise the score. To write correct and playable scores is of great importance.

I agree with you about trimming the 5-note chords. Unfortunately, I tend to write “to many notes” (LOL).

However, I left the 5-note chords in 63,64,66 and 68, otherwise it would sound to “thin”. But I arranged it with cross-staves for best playability.

I dropped some of  the r.h. bottom-E notes in ms 83 and 84, and made some other changes- also in ms 85. Much better now!

In ms 193, I removed the first three Eb´s of the 1/16^th notes in the lower stave, and in 196, I removed all of them. (Likewise, I simplified 197 and 200. Again, much better!

I have to think more about mss 33-40. For me, it does not come across as misplaced or comical, but I see what other people think of it. In any case, I would want to have a new passage with  a temporary key-change at ms33, to avoid monotony.

Finally I made some other corrections and small changes as you will notice (in the uploaded new score). I also replaced the playback file with a new one.

Once more- Thanks a lot for your effort!

Best regards.