Lost in the City - For Marimba and Piano

Hi, this is my piece Lost in the City. 

This is the first full original composition that I have ever written. I know it is not the most complicated thing out there as I am just a junior in high school, and I have no formal training in music composition whatsoever. So I basically just write down the ideas that come to mind, and this is really the only one that I have developed in to a full piece. However, I would still like constructive feedback on it and know what you guys think.

Also, the score is not the cleanest at the moment. There are definitely some errors especially with the piano pedaling.

Thanks 🙂

Edited May 4, 20187 yr by Jelly

I used to be a LOL player like you,

but then I got tired of the terrible people.

I don't think that high school students should be composers,

that's a terrible sin to do something else other than school, don't you know?

Just kidding.

Actually I'm still at school and am... about half a year older than you.

But it'll be over soon, and then I'm forced to go to the army (yey).

So let's see what we have here hm...

I think that it's nice for a first full comosition,

although it seems like you use the piano like it was an orchestral pitched percussion instrument

(I mean things like marimba, xylophone, vibraphone, glockenspiel, etc...)

I highly suggest you take a look at any piano score,

because the way you should compose for piano is different.

Also the rhythm is a bit boring,

but it's not that bad.

Here's a piano piece for example.

If you have a question call me like that @Rabbival507

Also you should follow the post but since you don't I have to notify you through that: @Jelly

@Jelly  There are some concepts of minimalism here. It sounds nice but you use the piano half of its possibilities, almost all the time there's only one hand playing. Yes, you could use both hands but it would be underused anyway.

@Rabbival507

Lol, I completely understand.  The community of League can be pretty toxic (as they say) at times. I just try to look forward to the good matches/people on League and block out all of the trivial drama from the immature players.

@Luis Hernández

I think I know what you talking about when you say that you recognize some concepts of minimalism, but my knowledge on the style is pretty vague. Could you elaborate a little on what you are seeing?

All of that aside, in response to the criticism, I have upated the piece. I took a look at the piano part and edited it to a more traditional part (I suppose), but kept some of the old, simpler part where I thought it fit. I also gave a lot of the old part to the added vibraphone in the updated version because I like how the old part sounded, but I understand that it wasn't characteristic of what would normally be played on the piano. 

Thanks for the feedback 🙂

Edited May 5, 20187 yr by Jelly

I was thinking in using repeated structures, diatonic harmonies, and the addition / subtraction in time signatures.

I guess I have never really been satisfied with this piece which is why I keep changing it, so here is another update. 🙂