edfgi234 Posted June 14, 2018 Posted June 14, 2018 I have composed a few nocturnes. This is my first one. It is very simple. Any advice for how to improve is of course appreciated. Quote
Luis Hernández Posted June 14, 2018 Posted June 14, 2018 I think it's an excellent example of romantic nocturno. There's a total lack of expression slurs, which I suppose are played. The harmonic change from measure 22 to 23 is a bit abrupt, but the changes that come afterwards are very nice. Although sometimes you break the left hand pattern, it's just for a moment. I think some contrast in that hand is always welcome. The arpeggios and broken chords are very beautiful, sometimes chromatic; but some contrast reinforces the second coming of the main theme. The end is a bit long because the chords don't bring anything new. Anyway, these are suggestions. I think your piece is quite nice. 1 Quote
Monarcheon Posted June 14, 2018 Posted June 14, 2018 m. 5, Bb should probably be A#, as it's a lead to the dominant as the next note of the melody. In the beginning the parallel octaves in between both hands is harmonically dry. m. 20 - no reason for the left hand part to be so empty. I get the effect you're going for, but the register of the left hand prevents it. I agree with Luis about the ending being long for the same reasons. Feels like an A' section and not an ending per se. I was mostly a fan of all your chord progressions. The rhythm of the melody didn't have to be so standard, I feel. It's a bit to beat-magnetized... like it overemphasizes the beat, which is okay in some situations, but this functions less like a waltz and more like flowing ambiguity, which your melodic rhythm prevents occasionally. 1 Quote
edfgi234 Posted June 14, 2018 Author Posted June 14, 2018 That is very helpful feedback. It is good to get such useful advice. Thank you both, I will apply this advice to the piece. Quote
edfgi234 Posted June 21, 2018 Author Posted June 21, 2018 Okay, I have tried to update this piece based on the advice given. Please do let me know if this is a step in the right/wrong direction. Your feedback was very constructive, so thanks for that. MP3 Play / pause JavaScript is required. 0:00 0:00 volume > next menu Nocturne no. 1 in E major > next PDF Nocturne no. 1 in E major - Full Score Quote
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