I Can't Forget You - Music for piano and strings orchestra

Hello,

This is my first post on this website.

I am a radiologist doctor in Thailand who really loves composing music.

This song was originally written as slow ballad music sung in Thai language. Later I made this arranged version.

I record this on Sonar.

Love to hear your comment.

PS. You can also check other works I compose on this soundcloud account!

https://soundcloud.com/charat-chukiat/i-cant-forget-you

I like it very much, particularly the development of the strings along the piece.

Sometimes the volume of the strings is in disbalance.

1:40 the dissonance is very strong here.

Welcome... (by the way...I'm an haematologist...)

On ‎9‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 3:36 AM, Luis Hernández said:

I like it very much, particularly the development of the strings along the piece.

Sometimes the volume of the strings is in disbalance.

1:40 the dissonance is very strong here.

 

Welcome... (by the way...I'm an haematologist...)

 

Thank you for the comment.

As for the dissonance, I intend the chord to be like that but it may sound weird. LOL

Thanks for a warm welcome!

1 hour ago, CharatChukiat said:

As for the dissonance, I intend the chord to be like that but it may sound weird.

That's fine, but you should know that your audience will perceive this as wrong against the rest of the music that's happened so far.
Your pattern of I - iv - I is very noticeable, and since 1:40 is an extension of this harmony, having the majors and minors superimposed doesn't match the energy you've built throughout. It literally just sounds like a wrong note. The same thing happens at 0:40 with the V/vi chord having a G natural in the countermelody but a G-sharp in the bassline. 
2:25 to 2:40 is extremely clunky. What sounds like a secondary dominant resolves to what sounds like a #vi chord before returning Dm7/G as a dominant pedal point to your tonic key. I can tell you have an idea of where you want your arc to go, but you seem uncertain on its execution.

I agree with @Monarcheon

If the atmosphere is tonal and consonant, a dissonance like that can be felt as a mistake in the writing.

In this background, if you want to put a disonance like that, perhaps you should prepare the audience first writing other weaker dissonances before. Repetition legitimize. If something odd is repeated, then it doesn't sound a mistake.