A Lonesome Journey ~ Cj Rhen

This is an original composition by me Christian "Cj" Rhen featuring flute, clarinet, trumpet, violin, cello, and piano. This will be performed at various events and professionally recorded by me for competitions and college apps. Tell me what you think. Instagram is @wind_player1

Two main things. The form is incredibly sporadic and I don't find your A section's main theme very impactful.
In regards to the form it's simply too jumpy for me. The music begs for more development and while there is a bit of retrogade play in the B and C sections I don't get a sense that it's much of a journey at all, albeit lonely.
A held note in a melody always concerns me and that's what happens with your A and A' sections. With such a banal drive under it, harmonically and rhythmically speaking it feels like the piece stops dead in its tracks for two measures.

29 minutes ago, Monarcheon said:

Two main things. The form is incredibly sporadic and I don't find your A section's main theme very impactful.
In regards to the form it's simply too jumpy for me. The music begs for more development and while there is a bit of retrogade play in the B and C sections I don't get a sense that it's much of a journey at all, albeit lonely.
A held note in a melody always concerns me and that's what happens with your A and A' sections. With such a banal drive under it, harmonically and rhythmically speaking it feels like the piece stops dead in its tracks for two measures.

 

I literally have a 3 minute maximum timeline, I decided to write a piece. Why I called it that, I don't know, but the trumpet parts will have the impact if Mahler 5, my intent at least won't know til a reading session, that software instrument is also a mush of vibrato and strange dynamics. The part with the long sustain everything part, is something I think would be appropriate for connecting the piece further, sadly I don't have the time to develope it.

34 minutes ago, Monarcheon said:

form

And forgive my small phone keyboard typos.

Well I'm accostumed to this kind of free forms. I use them all the time. It's catchy.