New Song Idea (Just Walk Away)

I've finished a first draft of a new song idea I've had, and wanted to share it will you all to see what you think?

It's been a little while since I've written anything intended for a band (it's been maybe 8 years since I've been in one). I recorded both the guitars you here in the track myself, I mapped the drums and bass through Midi instruments.

I do plan on continuing the song, adding an intro other than a count in, perhaps a solo section (If I'm still too rusty :P ) or outro etc. This is just the raw idea in terms of verse and chorus.

I've included the track itself and also the same track but with a piano template to give a rough idea of the vocal line I had imagined.

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to listen! :)  (I'll add the first draft of the lyrics I wrote below too)

Draft Lyrics (I'm not great at lyrics :P)

I remember the day I came back for you,
I still hear the words, I can not forget,
I try to carry on, just keep pushing through,
those words your lips did spell, I'll never forget,

Just walk away, just walk away, just walk away from here,
just walk away, just walk away, just walk away from this.

Some things will stay unsaid now, I'm letting you go,
The things I wanted to say, I've put them to bed,
and that side of me, I re-fuse to show,
Do not worry about it, it's just like you said,

I'll walk away, I'll walk away, I'll walk away, from here,
I'll walk away, I'll walk away, I'll walk away, from this.      X4

Good recording quality for your instruments, makes for a nice sound. Some notes slightly out of tune, be aware of that. (Things like that don't bother me, I think that the live sound is worth the imperfections.) Try to find spots to alter the riffs to help the phrasing (i.e. riff1, riff1, riff1 altered, riff1 with finishing feeling), rather than just repeating them verbatim each time.

Adding vocals would help, to be sure, it's hard to imagine melodically/stylistically what those would sound like without actually being able to hear them.

Good recording, good writing, think of phrasing!

Gustav