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Posted

A short piece, inspired by Schubert's Moments Musciaux (in this case no. 4).  I dug out an old sketch from years ago, dusted it off, managed to have enough of a spark to finish it.  That's why I save everything!

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  • Like 1
  • 1 month later...
Posted

What an energetic little "musical moment!" Here are some thoughts.

1. There is a sense of "perpetuum mobile" to this piece that bothers me just a little bit, and that is, that I just feel like there is not a moment for me to really get a break to reflect on each phrase. May a short (eight note) rest or note would be enough to do this. I'm not saying what you have in bad by any means, and my thought is very subjective, but I will say that there is just no place at all in the piece to really reflect at all, it just goes and goes.

2. At measure 8, I think the scalar motion going upward really takes away the cadential moment at measure 7. I think it would serve you well to just have a definitive cadence there and then start with stuff at measure 9.

3. That section at 9 forward is really quite beautiful and well thought out. I very much like how the momentum is continuous there. Great job.

4. The development is fantastic, good job using the material you have.

6. Measure 48 strikes me as the same as what I said on point 2. I actually think 49 and 50 is a great ending, but is there some other way you can arrive to that then the arpeggio going upward to it? I don't know, just wondering.

 

  • Like 1
Posted

This looks like a fun piece to play! I like the main theme the most - it's particularly catchy. Indeed, I think it's strong enough for the main theme of a longer piece.
If I were to suggest anything, I think it could benefit from a bit more chromaticism at times as it seemed quite diatonic in places (e.g. m43), however that is just to my personal tastes.
 

  • Like 1
  • 3 weeks later...
Posted

Very charming, and most of it would lay nicely under the hand. You're probably already aware of it, but there are some collisions between notes and expressive elements in certain places in the score (20-21 for instance). Like Mogri, I find the 7-8 transition (and other places this appears) sounds a bit... I don't know... off? I don't know why it bugs me. It could be the bass line. I like the perpetual motion character, so I wouldn't personally use a firm cadence there if it meant breaking the motion, but I wouldn't leave it the way it is either.

Not my piece, though. If you like it, leave it be!

  • 7 months later...
Posted

Ooh!  I love this!  Sorry to be so late to the commenting party, but I seem to have missed this one when you first posted it.  The transition at measure 9 is particularly fun, and I like the variety that the syncopated texture in the left hand adds at measure 14.  If it was my piece, I would have added some more of that character to the second half of the piece, maybe with even more exaggerated long and short rhythms, but the whole thing is great and sounds like it would be a lot of fun to play!  

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