voice Erlkönig

This is a setting of the Goethe poem Erlkönig that I decided to write after discovering Beethoven's version of the piece. Please be constructive with your feedback, I'm very proud of this piece.

I think you did a nice job bringing a good deal of variety within a relatively strict texture. The music flowed quite nicely, so I think you should be proud!

Some of the ways that I might improve upon it would include adding dynamics to both parts, adding phrase markings for the piano (this could be writing it a few times, then with a 'simile' if you want that throughout), and perhaps thinking about ways to vary the texture slightly in future projects. It works well in this piece, but it is something to consider. Phrase markings would usually be added only to melismatic parts in a vocal part (with the slurs traditionally always arching upward so as not to interfere with the proximity of the lyrics); I have seen some scores that add them for other reasons, however.

The music is fairly syllabic, and so adding a melisma or two might help strengthen the story-telling aspect of the poetry. This can amplify the connection of the music and the poetry, and it also varies the texture of the vocal part.

Overall, I think you did a good job!

Thanks! This is really a first draft more than anything else. It's definitely one of the better things that I've written. But yes, it does get a little bit repetitive, which is something I believe I can improve on relatively easily. The main reason there isn't more is that it's incredibly tedious to put in lots of markings in the program I use to notate this stuff. If it weren't so difficult and time consuming, there would be significantly more of that here.

I feel you should make those alterations - fight the tedium to put in the markings particularly those that affect the rendering/virtual performance: some judicious Pedal for a start; a change in the tempo/dynamic here and there, using the characters' entries to adjust it etc.  It isn't just the notes, it's how they're played that counts.

But I have to admit it sounds more than slightly Schubertian, the triplet figures, the harmony; but you need more contrast where the Erlkoenig speaks; and when the child screams out. The ending needs different treatment when the father discovers the child dead, rather than go on with the same triplet figures. The harmony doesn't sound foreboding enough by far and the last bar does the piece and the subject a disservice. 

I tend to go along with Schubert here - his version grinds to a halt. "In seinen Armen..." is a vocal solo. I'm not suggesting you crib Schubert's idea but something more ramped down would conclude the drama. As the father reaches home and makes his discovery, is he likely to go on galloping past as the accompaniment implies? Even a rall...maybe ending on a cadence approached by a Neapolitan 6th, marcato chords, staccato except the last chord. I suppose it depends on how dramatic you want the piece to be.

Is it possible to adjust the voice articulations at all?

Anyway, I'll look forward to hearing your revision. 

Bests.

Ok. I made some revisions and changes. Tell me what you think, I can always go back and tweak more.

Note: The reason why there aren't more specific dynamics and pedaling is because they are an absolute pain to put in with the software I'm currently using. It's free, so I guess that's one of it's main drawbacks. It also can't actually do rallentando, so I have it marked but you won't hear it.