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Posted (edited)

Hi there is a very special quote in the piano 228 and in 230 i try to build suspense

Edited by hw1234
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  • hw1234 changed the title to Piano 228 and 233 and 230
  • 2 months later...
Posted

Piano 228: Nice start, even included some borrowed notes (F#) that set us up nicely to transition to a new tonal center... but it never happened. The way you handled the harmonizing of "Ode to Joy" was inconsistent with the rest of the piece, which employed harmonic transitions after 2 beats. In the Ode to Joy section, your harmonies are allowed to change every beat. Then it moves on to seemingly unrelated material with harmonies rooted in the vii position (weak and transitional). This needs to be addressed.

Piano 233: Here at least we modulate to E minor, although the transition isn't very well done. The melodies are nice; it's a shame you don't do much with them. And the rhythmic patterns are quite inconsistent. You might have had the left hand continue the opening rhythm (quarter note followed by 16th notes) after the transition to E minor, but instead we are introduced to a brand new rhythm with dotted 8th + 16th notes. You probably also should have begun the minor section at the start of a measure rather than halfway through one, since your melodic material began on the first beat of a measure.

Piano 230: This opens with confusing harmony... are we in F# minor or D major (with a III root)? But at least here your rhythmic patterns are more consistent and recognizable. The section beginning at M13 is nice, an effective use of cadences/modulation. However, the harmonic progressions afterward lose their potency, mainly because you fail to establish convincing root chords. For example, in M19 you have what appears to be a B minor chord in beats 3 and 4, but both voices begin this chord on F#, which isn't very convincing. The bass (root) should have been a B note moving to an F#, instead of how you currently have it.

That's all I have for now. Keep it up!

Best,
Jörfi

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