Sonata in E-flat Major, First Movement

Hi,

Here is the first movement of a piano sonata in e-flat major

please enjoy

BREAKDOWN OF MOVEMENT:

As someone who believe that sonata form is the best musical form of all, I can't just let you butcher it 😒

But first, the good parts.

Although a bit repetitive in many places amounting to a heavily repetitive feeling, I think you have presented the themes/ideas in a very thoughtful way, there are questions and answers, so each individual part feels connected.
Your development(?) (question mark... I'll come to that) section feels also quite carefully planned out and has an overall sense of direction. It is lacking in personality but I think if you are imitating this sort of Mozart/Haydn style of music in the 21th century it will inevitably given that feeling no matter how good the music is.

There are some harmonic issues generally throughout the piece but with a bit of studying I think you can improve this piece easily.
Why are you using ABA form in the exposition? At the end of the exposition, you have to move away from where you began the exposition with. This is why the second subject is almost always in another key and ends there for the exposition, and is the only reason why monothematic sonatas would even work. End your codetta in a foreign key.
The recapitulation is basically a repeat of the exposition. If you have actually moved away from the home key first in the exposition your recapitulation would then necessarily and naturally sound different from the exposition, which is unfortunately not the case here.
Again with the issue of keys. You ending the development section (which is the best part of your piece, kudos) in the home key then followed by the recap in the same home key is anticlimatic. In this styling of music writing, at the end of the development section it is typical to use the dominant key as the pedal point (i.e. the V chord for many bars) for the home key to return as a perfect cadence. If your first theme of the expo is more fluid then you can play around with this transition (check out my sonatina in A major btw).

Overall I like this well-mannered piece, but it has many elements of rooms for improvement that need reworking to be made good.

Hello @malumCompositor,

For me this is a good try on the sonata form.

-For the harmonic plan of the exposition, I agree with @PCC. In history the harmony differs earlier than the materials in the exposition (or the rounded binary). It's fine if you end the exposition proper with a cadence first before smoothly transitioning back to the exposition repeat/development and modulate to other keys including tonic. The first movements of Haydn's two string quartets in B minor, op.33 no.1 and op. 64 no.2, and Brahms' Clarinet Quintet in B minor make perfect examples as they play on the ambiguity of B minor/D major as well for the opening theme. But here you never make a proper cadence for the B flat major 2nd subject first before transitioning, so the structure will be unclear. Make sure at least have a PAC on Bb major first before heading back to the opening Eb tonic!

-For the figuration of b.33, just alternate the D-F to F-D in either one of the inner parts will make the sound more varied. 

-For me I feel like the movement is quite repetitive since the texture always sticks to the motive presented. For example the uprising 16th motive in b.24 is almost always played in octaves except in b.95. The exposition the motive does combine with quaver figures but the overall sentence itself is repeating. Make sure to vary the texture will make it more refreshed!

-I also think that the development is the best section. B.77 is ambiguous harmonically with the B natural hanging over a E natural bass, and I will prevent the double E natural repeating b.79,81 & 83 since the sound is not full. B.94 is my favourite since you're having counterpoint here and mixing the textures! 

-For b.113 would it be better to a half cadence of C minor?

-The entrance of Eb major in b.150 is ambiguous. You have the Eb major introduced as the V/Ab first then suddenly enters it as the recapitulation, and the effect is not surprising or dramatic at all. I think it will be easier to write with a clear cadence on the dominant of Eb first to enter to the key more smoothly in the recap, as (again) @PCC noted.

-For me maybe it will better to enter the recapitulation in a different, then have the coda restore the Eb major to make the music more interesting, since I feel like the Eb major is over-abundant here. But that's personal.

Thx for sharing!

Henry