Guardian25 Posted July 20, 2023 Posted July 20, 2023 (edited) Here is a Vivace in c minor that I made for a planned Flute Sonata! Any feedback is welcomed! Edited July 20, 2023 by Guardian25 MP3 Play / pause JavaScript is required. 0:00 0:00 volume > next menu Vivace in c minor > next PDF Vivace in c minor Quote
Henry Ng Tsz Kiu Posted July 21, 2023 Posted July 21, 2023 Hello @Guardian25, I like this Baroque dance! It's indeed full of vivacity! For me the melody in b.27 strange. The Ab in RH for me should be A natural since in there the harmony is still in D minor or G minor for me. For b.32 after you have the V/F I suggest you add a bar for F minor harmony, before getting to E flat major in b.33 (or V/Eb there), since I think this will be more fluent! Also I feel like the ending on C minor is in a rush because you don't establish its return first and then you have the movement immediately ends on its return! I think you can have the first 8 bar recapitulates at the end, but this time it stays in C minor rather than modulate to Eb major. What do you think? Thx for sharing! Henry 1 Quote
Guardian25 Posted July 22, 2023 Author Posted July 22, 2023 20 hours ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said: Hello @Guardian25, I like this Baroque dance! It's indeed full of vivacity! For me the melody in b.27 strange. The Ab in RH for me should be A natural since in there the harmony is still in D minor or G minor for me. For b.32 after you have the V/F I suggest you add a bar for F minor harmony, before getting to E flat major in b.33 (or V/Eb there), since I think this will be more fluent! Also I feel like the ending on C minor is in a rush because you don't establish its return first and then you have the movement immediately ends on its return! I think you can have the first 8 bar recapitulates at the end, but this time it stays in C minor rather than modulate to Eb major. What do you think? Thx for sharing! Henry I have updated the idea with the advice you gave! I think I like the recapitulation idea! I tried it in the updated version. What do you think? MP3 Play / pause JavaScript is required. 0:00 0:00 volume > next menu Vivace in c minor Flute > next PDF Vivace in c minor Flute 1 Quote
Henry Ng Tsz Kiu Posted July 22, 2023 Posted July 22, 2023 Hey @Guardian25, Yeah I feel like it's more fluent and balanced now! Just two things, for b.28 I think the B flats can be changed to B naturals, and for b.42 I feel like the harmony can go to dominant G major first for a half cadenec before recapitulating the opening passage. Thx for update! Henry 1 Quote
Guardian25 Posted July 22, 2023 Author Posted July 22, 2023 2 hours ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said: Hey @Guardian25, Yeah I feel like it's more fluent and balanced now! Just two things, for b.28 I think the B flats can be changed to B naturals, and for b.42 I feel like the harmony can go to dominant G major first for a half cadenec before recapitulating the opening passage. Thx for update! Henry I updated it with this two suggestions! MP3 Play / pause JavaScript is required. 0:00 0:00 volume > next menu Vivace in c minor Flute > next PDF Vivace in c minor Flute 1 Quote
Simen-N Posted July 23, 2023 Posted July 23, 2023 Hello Guardian! In my opinion this is the best baroque piece i have heard form you. You really the melodic language in your head. There are many who try to sound baroque, if one try to arrange it its impossible because the melodic material is modern in nature. This problem is not something you have, and that is great. I think this piece as a whole is very plesant to listen to, you have some very good ideas. There are a couple of things you should focus on: Harmonic rhythm. Harmony/progressions. I think you main harmony (on the strong beats) works overall good, but its the passing notes and unprepared harmonic changes that is the problem. Often the tempo can cover this up, as it does here. For example look at score below to see more clear what i mean. Great job, keep it up! 🙂 MP3 Play / pause JavaScript is required. 0:00 0:00 volume > next menu Guardian 25 vivace lyd > next PDF Guardian 25 vivace - score 1 Quote
Guardian25 Posted July 25, 2023 Author Posted July 25, 2023 On 7/23/2023 at 5:25 PM, Simen-N said: Hello Guardian! In my opinion this is the best baroque piece i have heard form you. You really the melodic language in your head. There are many who try to sound baroque, if one try to arrange it its impossible because the melodic material is modern in nature. This problem is not something you have, and that is great. I think this piece as a whole is very plesant to listen to, you have some very good ideas. There are a couple of things you should focus on: Harmonic rhythm. Harmony/progressions. I think you main harmony (on the strong beats) works overall good, but its the passing notes and unprepared harmonic changes that is the problem. Often the tempo can cover this up, as it does here. For example look at score below to see more clear what i mean. Great job, keep it up! 🙂 Thanks! I appreciate the feedback! And that is something I noticed about my writing is that I need to work better on harmonic rhythm. I think sometimes to try to incorporate more harmonies than necessary and need to start simplifying my overall harmonic thinking. Like in your example the harmonies are very clear. I will need to work on this! Quote
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