Dramatic small Kyrie

Okay, doing this was SO random. I just sat and started doing some chord progressions and then I concluded that it would fit the idea of a Kyrie. Also I haven't composed for voice in ages...

I want to ask advice on something specific though. How would you add more rhythmic variety to this kind of counterpoint in 3/4? Also does the piece remind you of any other existing work?

Hey Ivan @Ivan1791,

4 minutes ago, Ivan1791 said:

I want to ask advice on something specific though. How would you add more rhythmic variety to this kind of counterpoint in 3/4?

Maybe just add some florid counterpoint of quaver notes between voices? I like your usage of suspension and you should use more of them to signify the pain of a sleepless night!

I think the middle line should be "Christie Eleison"?

4 minutes ago, Ivan1791 said:

Also does the piece remind you of any other existing work?

The opening does remind me the opening of Bach's Mass in B minor.

Thx for sharing!

Henry

15 minutes ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

Hey Ivan @Ivan1791,

Maybe just add some florid counterpoint of quaver notes between voices? I like your usage of suspension and you should use more of them to signify the pain of a sleepless night!

I think the middle line should be "Christie Eleison"?

The opening does remind me the opening of Bach's Mass in B minor.

Thx for sharing!

Henry

 

Hahahahaha, it's to funny to imagine the idea of describing the sadness of not being able to sleep. 😂 

I always saw it as "Christe Eleison".

You are right! I probably took inspiration unconsciously. 

2 minutes ago, Ivan1791 said:

I always saw it as "Christe Eleison".

Yeah I was wrong to say Christie since I read Agatha Christie too much LoL, but in your lyrics it's "Criste" haha!!

3 minutes ago, Ivan1791 said:

Hahahahaha, it's to funny to imagine the idea of describing the sadness of not being able to sleep. 😂 

🤣

Lovely music! Hopefully it didn't take too long and you had some time to finally sleep 😛

I've hardly written any choral music, so to my ears it sounded really nice. It was like a sorrowful lullaby, like a song a mother would sing to her infant son she floated down a river in hopes of a better life. 

There were a few moments that felt out of place for me, and one in particular.

In bars 5-8, you do this thing where you split the 5th of the chord. Bar 5 to me actually sounds really cool on the middle beat. You're briefly on your III chord but you have D and D#. The bass and tenor are separated by a maj7th, so the chord really stood out to me as powerful in it's dissonance. 

However, bar 7 has such a harsh dissonance out of nowhere imo. I see it as C7 but with a split 5th again (and no 3rd), and it's in the melody. It's just extra jarring written like that. I see what you're going for, it's almost has the slightest bluesy tinge to it. Maybe a slide up to G# in the soprano while the alto has tied G's if you really like the effect? Possibly finding a way to have an E note in the chord with only one fifth? Or pick G or G# to be doubled?

I remember you had some minor 2nd dissonance in something else I've listened to, but I think it just depends on the mood of the music. Sure it's great in something funky or quirky, even something to portray horror. But with a lush choral piece, I'd continue to experiment with ways to maybe set up some dissonant moments a little longer. 

As always, thanks for sharing. I dig your stuff 😄

Wonderful!  Nice rendition and the harmony is crunchy in choice places and in more than the stereotypical ways of creating dissonance in choral music!  Although I would have liked to add some reverb to the mix - this is a great rendition besides being so dry.  Thanks for sharing!

On 12/8/2023 at 6:38 AM, Thatguy v2.0 said:

Lovely music! Hopefully it didn't take too long and you had some time to finally sleep 😛

I've hardly written any choral music, so to my ears it sounded really nice. It was like a sorrowful lullaby, like a song a mother would sing to her infant son she floated down a river in hopes of a better life. 

There were a few moments that felt out of place for me, and one in particular.

In bars 5-8, you do this thing where you split the 5th of the chord. Bar 5 to me actually sounds really cool on the middle beat. You're briefly on your III chord but you have D and D#. The bass and tenor are separated by a maj7th, so the chord really stood out to me as powerful in it's dissonance. 

However, bar 7 has such a harsh dissonance out of nowhere imo. I see it as C7 but with a split 5th again (and no 3rd), and it's in the melody. It's just extra jarring written like that. I see what you're going for, it's almost has the slightest bluesy tinge to it. Maybe a slide up to G# in the soprano while the alto has tied G's if you really like the effect? Possibly finding a way to have an E note in the chord with only one fifth? Or pick G or G# to be doubled?

I remember you had some minor 2nd dissonance in something else I've listened to, but I think it just depends on the mood of the music. Sure it's great in something funky or quirky, even something to portray horror. But with a lush choral piece, I'd continue to experiment with ways to maybe set up some dissonant moments a little longer. 

As always, thanks for sharing. I dig your stuff 😄

 

I stayed awake for the next day but after that I had some decent rest. xD

Interesting, like Moses story. 🙂 I think I pictured a chathedral in my mind when writing it.

Yes, the false relationship is the main generatig idea. It comes from the G/G# that appears between bass and alto in the first 3 measures. 

I thought about different solutions and I decided to use that one because from experience I always found dominant 7ths a type of chord that allows many different dissonances to work. So I couldn't miss the Bb (which I rewrote as an A#), and the false relationship was what I wanted to accentuate for the cadence. Maybe in 5 voices I would have done something a bit different.

I will think about it. I did this piece as a way to return to choral writing, so I need to get used to it again.

You are welcome! Thank you for your appreciation and your comment. ^^

17 hours ago, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

Wonderful!  Nice rendition and the harmony is crunchy in choice places and in more than the stereotypical ways of creating dissonance in choral music!  Although I would have liked to add some reverb to the mix - this is a great rendition besides being so dry.  Thanks for sharing!

 

You are right. A friend of mine ( @Ferran Carrasquer ) experimented a bit and he found out that with Audacity the playback can sound very realistic. I will use it for next time. Thanks for commenting!