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Posted
33 minutes ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

Yo @Louis dB,

There's a parallel octave in b.2 from A to F#, a p. octave in b.3 from G to F#. I would also prevent the double leading tone (C#) in b.4 and b.5 (G#).

Henry

 

dont see the parallel in b.2

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