Tableau No. 5

Hi all,

I wanted to share my latest composition, hoping for some feedback!

Enjoy the listening 🙂!

Julien

PS: Scores and midi files are available here: https://imslp.org/wiki/Tableau_No.5_(Piaser%2C_Julien)

tableau 5.mid

Hi @mazeth,

I think the piece is quite Baroque with many sequences and similar figuration. The hand crossing is interesting. I love your attempt for the modulations, for example in b38, but I think they can be smoother rather than just having a chord! For b.90, maybe having an A#-A natural bass will be smoother. I think the Db in the first section should all be C# since it’s in d minor! I think some of the expressions can be deleted since only one is enough for each staff! Thx for sharing.

Henry

Hi @Henry Ng Tsz Kiu,

Many thanks for having taken the time to give me your feedback, that's very much appreciated, and it will definitely help to improve!

8 hours ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

with many sequences and similar figuration

Does it give a feeling of "too many things packed in one"? Or on the contrary, is it too repetitive?

8 hours ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

The hand crossing is interesting

Yes, I wanted to create an effect of voices answering one-another

8 hours ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

I love your attempt for the modulations, for example in b38, but I think they can be smoother rather than just having a chord!

Maybe you're right, I will give it a think!

8 hours ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

For b.90, maybe having an A#-A natural bass

I played a bit around, and went for A natural, followed by A#. Thanks for the tip

8 hours ago, Henry Ng Tsz Kiu said:

I think the Db in the first section should all be C# since it’s in d minor! I think some of the expressions can be deleted since only one is enough for each staff!

Absolutely, I'm not super good at spotting those mistakes -> all corrected 😉 !

Take care,

Julien

tableau 5.mid

I think it is a beautiful composition and very well worked. I would not know how to fit it because it has many resources of baroque counterpoint, but the feeling later on is quite romantic.
I think the modulations make it quite modern, but some changes are very abrupt, not only in terms of modulation but also in terms of textures and rhythm. For example the passage from the sextuplets to the following (measures 26 - 27) is a bit surprising.
I think you can totally change from one section to another but something I learned (and try to apply, although it is forgotten) is that the more different the sections are, the more elaborate the transition has to be.
Another thing I find is that there is a lot of material, and while there is a sense of unity, it sounds a bit "rhapsodic".

Good work!

Hi @Luis Hernández 

On 5/19/2024 at 10:15 AM, Luis Hernández said:

I think it is a beautiful composition and very well worked

Many thanks, goes to my heart, and will motivate me to continue writing!

On 5/19/2024 at 10:15 AM, Luis Hernández said:

I think you can totally change from one section to another but something I learned (and try to apply, although it is forgotten) is that the more different the sections are, the more elaborate the transition has to be.

Mmmh, very interesting comment, I'll definitely try to keep it in mind and will work on that in the future! 

On 5/19/2024 at 10:15 AM, Luis Hernández said:

Another thing I find is that there is a lot of material, and while there is a sense of unity, it sounds a bit "rhapsodic".

You made me look for the definition of "rhapsody", and I agree with you, the term fits it well... Maybe it's a personality trait, as I don't like when things are "too stable" ;-).

Again, many thanks for taking the time to listen and comment, much appreciated! 

Hi @mazeth

I personally enjoyed the section at 0:34 - I think it manages to marry the baroque elements with a more cinematic/storytelling approach to harmony.  I think the Alberti bass would usually get tiring if used this much in a piece that stayed in a classical style, but since this doesn't stay in a classical style it doesn't encounter that problem.  The middle section at 2:27 sounds especially tragic and melancholy and I love it (and it also comes at a time when the Alberti bass might be getting tiring if continued).  The gradual way you bring back the Alberti bass by mixing it with the middle melancholy section is also great and shows great skill in transitioning.  And then you return to the cinematic section from the beginning at 4:41.  Very pleasing formally, melodically and overall, musically.  Thanks so much for sharing this gem!

Hi @PeterthePapercomPoser,

Many thanks for taking the time to give me your feedback.

On 5/23/2024 at 4:41 AM, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

it manages to marry the baroque elements with a more cinematic/storytelling approach to harmony.

Interesting, gives me another perspective of my work, thanks! (I never looked at it like that, but indeed, your analysis makes sense!)

On 5/23/2024 at 4:41 AM, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

Alberti bass

Had to look at the definition ;-), and indeed, I used quite a lot of it in my piece. And thanks for the comment.

On 5/23/2024 at 4:41 AM, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

tragic and melancholy and I love it.

Thanks so much for sharing this gem!

Thanks for that, it for sure will encourage me to continue composing!

Take care,

Julien