Marina (Galatea)

I would like some feedback on this nocturne-like late romantic piece.

This is the piece I submitted for @Ivan1791’s contest and it depicts this painting, which is essentially a love scene between a nymph and a human at an idyllic seascape at dawn in the Spanish coast (I think it is Valencia).

even though the degree of thematical-motivical economity is not really high, I think it is acceptable for the style. And the same goes with the structure (ABA-ish) it is defined and balanced, but nothing too complex.

Where I focused on making a complex work was in the areas of harmony and textures, where I experimented and found interesting devices that I can use further in my compositional journey.

I would appreciate feedback and areas of further development.

Hello @Jqh73o!

I like the painting you chose!  And the music brings to mind another piece based on a very similar idea - Gaspard de la Nuit by Ravel.  I think you did a good job keeping the piece playable, and thematically simple despite the huge florid arpeggiation acrobatics which I guess are also here meant to portray water?  I think the music is lovely and melancholic at the same time.  The music also develops logically and sounds very Spanish which I think was your intent with having entered this in the Estampes de Espana contest?  I think you did a great job!  You got honorable mention (at least!) in my book.  Thanks for sharing.

Thank you very much for your response. I haven’t thought about the programmatic similarities with ondine from gaspard de la nuit, but now that you pointed it out I realised how similar the concept is (though the music is much worse).

The “huge florid arpegiation acrobatics” as you described are indeed supposed to describe the waves that approach the shore intensely (represented with triplets) and whose energy dies to be put back into the ocean (represented by the normal semiquavers).

It’s nice to read that you enjoyed it, because when I finished I thought it was horrible and sounded soulless and had to revise it. 
Thank you for your kind words.

Awesome piano technique! 🙂

some suggestion for improvement perhaps could be sometimes when the melody is highlighted in the high register you could make jumps to double the melody in the bass.

I think I have heard that technique somewhere before which I thought was pretty effective.

at around 3:00 Perhaps an idea could be which I have seen composers like Liszt do where he starts energy sometimes with a trill but you could also do it the way you did where it will be transformed to a run across octaves (for example la campanella or i think he does this as well in libestrum)

This could then be transformaed to a background element.

An other way of doing this is perhaps keep what you do in the piece but then repeat it later again modulated perhaps a whole tone above which could create suspension and then add the run.

I also think this piece could benefit from more modulation. The harmonies in of it self are interesting but they could add more depth through more modulation.

I think that this piece may also be a bit too much minor harmonies and could beneficial with a contrasting section of a major section of course still following the same thematical ideas.

I hope this is something you can use. I am really impressive with your composing ability which already feel mature. I think you have a very promising composing future ahead 🙂