"The Hallowed Knight's Journey" | It's done (I think) More or less, would like a proof-read before I publish this ;)

The_Hallowed_Knights_Journey__UncleRed99.pdf

https://musescore.com/user/13593191/scores/24695323  

Hi @UncleRed99!

I just listened to this casually without looking at the score.  For me, it seems to be good background music for some foreground film/media.  As a piece of music it seems to lack a long leading melodic line.  Often, I perceive it as just an orchestrated chord progression.  I don't hear any themes, motives or melodies that stick in my memory and make me hum it after I've finished listening to it.  Perhaps there's melodies here but I just didn't catch them?  Or they're so few and far between and dissolved in the piece that they don't stimulate the listeners mind often enough to be noticed?  Anyway, that's my perception of the piece.  Thanks for sharing!

9 hours ago, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

Hi @UncleRed99!

I just listened to this casually without looking at the score.  For me, it seems to be good background music for some foreground film/media.  As a piece of music it seems to lack a long leading melodic line.  Often, I perceive it as just an orchestrated chord progression.  I don't hear any themes, motives or melodies that stick in my memory and make me hum it after I've finished listening to it.  Perhaps there's melodies here but I just didn't catch them?  Or they're so few and far between and dissolved in the piece that they don't stimulate the listeners mind often enough to be noticed?  Anyway, that's my perception of the piece.  Thanks for sharing!

 

I didn't do a ton of mixing/mastering of the audio, more or less was focused on the music itself. If you get the chance to follow along, I'd like to hear your thoughts! As I was sure to have a melodic line through the piece, with some of those melodies briefly following the rhythm of the chord progression. I'm sure it would help if I went through to make those parts more pronounced. Thanks for your feedback on that. I'll be sure to make the audio reflect that, and make any changes in the score that might help with exaggerating the melodic lines

Edit: 
I went back thru and listened with a clean slate, and could hear what you're saying. I did a bit poorly when marking dynamics for volume. The Melodic lines are blended with the harmonic lines. I've went through and either doubled / tripled up on the melodic voices, and adjusted dynamics. Going to update the post with that tonight. 🙂

On 4/14/2025 at 12:38 PM, PeterthePapercomPoser said:

Hi @UncleRed99!

I just listened to this casually without looking at the score.  For me, it seems to be good background music for some foreground film/media.  As a piece of music it seems to lack a long leading melodic line.  Often, I perceive it as just an orchestrated chord progression.  I don't hear any themes, motives or melodies that stick in my memory and make me hum it after I've finished listening to it.  Perhaps there's melodies here but I just didn't catch them?  Or they're so few and far between and dissolved in the piece that they don't stimulate the listeners mind often enough to be noticed?  Anyway, that's my perception of the piece.  Thanks for sharing!

 

I hope you will consider taking another look at this, whenever you’re able to find the time for it 🙂 I’ve made many improvements to it since. 
 

I know that my form / structure is a bit abstract/abnormal. 
 

I met a friend on Musescore back when I wrote “The Long arctic midnight suite” in 11/8 time, and he also edited my score “Lamentation” on his own volition. 
 

we sat in a discord call for like 5 hours yesterday, analyzing one another’s scores. He’s a composer and is on his way to getting his masters in composition, and he performs as a classical pianist. He gave me some material on Binary and Ternary Form structure, and stated that I’d probably be most interested in Sonata structure.. (all of which I was clueless about until now 😅) 

He says he thinks this is one of the better compositions I’ve written, based on the modulation, and the chord progressions I’ve used, as well as the complexity in voicings within the chords and the melodic lines. Although, the form could’ve been executed in a way that would’ve been easier to digest. He called this “through composed” mostly, with some returns to a main motif. 
 

with this context, I believe what I’ve done, here, could be better understood, in addition to the changes I’ve made. 
 

I value your feedback as well as @Henry Ng Tsz Kiu’s feedback in this forum, given how methodical and detail oriented you both tend to be. I’m just looking to improve upon what I already know, learn what I do not know, understand what I have accomplished effectively, and have things to reflect on in regard to what was ineffective or poorly executed. 
 

i know I’m just an autodidact who does this as a hobby, but I’m a bit of a perfectionist who’d love to be that outlier independent composer who can write scores that are educated, well executed, and well received by the internal industry audience. 🙂 thank you in advance, Peter !

wait! @Henry Ng Tsz Kiu, I noticed you liked that comment while I was editing the post!! If you're taking a look at it, refresh the page first! 🤣

Hi again @UncleRed99!

My perception hasn't changed by much, but I think I can better explain why I perceive the piece the way I perceive it.  I can hear that you definitely intend there to be a main melody leading the piece from beginning to end but there are a few factors that (in my opinion) prevent this from being a lucid listening experience for the listener.  Sometimes the melody is just overpowered by chords in the orchestra played loudly while a single solo instrument is playing the melody and it doesn't really get heard.  The most obvious example being the bass clarinet melody in bar 5.  There are also other examples where you kind of create a polyphonic/heterophonic texture where it becomes kinda hard to hear which instrument is supposed to be the focus or main melodic line.  There are ways to make polyphonic/heterophonic textures work though but that would necessitate them being more self-similar and use a higher economy of means to achieve a more obvious audible relation to each other.  While if that isn't achieved, then it can end up sounding like you're just noodling around in a certain key.  Although I don't want to neglect to give you credit where credit is due.  You definitely have a recognizable motif that permeates this piece:

  It's just that this is a very short recognizable motif that is just repeated throughout the piece without really being used to develop it by using it as the dynamo and origin of all of your other melodic material.  When the other material isn't connected together it can sound dissolute and lacking in direction or focus.  That's my perception of the piece.  I'm glad you're so determined to continue to improve and I hope some of what I said can help you further on your journey!

Analyzed your Trax ,and this one is far superior in Audio-Production quality, than the previous upload.

less "Drop-Outs", with more even Consistency.

so you are making progress,as opposed to remaining Static.